Not the best start to the day

7:15 am:

• Attack of Morning Coffee down front of white cardigan; too far from home to drive back and change.
• Must wear brown splotchy badge of defeat until return home at 6 pm

8:45 am:

• Toner Explosion from ancient technology known as fax machine
• Hands blackened, white cardigan unbelievably remained unscathed

10:00 am:

• Cuticles sliced by toilet paper dispenser (seriously, the roll was waaaay too big for the plastic dispenser)
• Developed mild paranoia will contract deadly tropical disease despite "antimicrobial" sticker

Currently is 12:00 pm. Hoping bad luck really does come in threes and I am done for the day. Ugh. I want to crawl under my desk and hide from my future.
 

***UPDATE: ***
12:30 pm:

• Phone died (this may have been averted if I did not leave charger at home)

2:00 pm:

• choked a bit on a Granny Smith Apple; feeling intimidated by equally raw and crunchy baby carrots

The stakes in this game of bad luck are getting a little high for me. As of 2:10 pm, have not found voodoo doll in office. Searching for alternative explanations to "Unfortunate Happenings" phenomena

Listening to: "Fleur de Saison" by Emilie Simon